Unplugged and Turned On
Unplugged and Turned On is a podcast about what really happens when you step outside the scripts and explore connection, attraction, and relationships in a more open, honest way. Hosted by a real couple navigating the lifestyle together, we dive into the moments you don’t always hear about - the chemistry, the curiosity, the awkwardness, and everything in between.
Beyond the lifestyle, we explore communication, emotional awareness, and practical tools to help you connect more deeply in every part of your relationships.
Real conversations. Real experiences. Just a little electric.
Unplugged and Turned On
Our First Taste of Desire
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You can do everything “right” at a lifestyle resort and still get surprised by what’s real once you arrive. We’re sharing our honest Desire Riviera Maya review, from the jungle-gate drive in and the first lap around the property, to the daily rhythm that shapes the whole experience: quiet pool versus party pool, rooftop hot tub time, dinner schedules, and the late-night options we thought we’d do but mostly didn’t. We also talk about expectations we had from podcasts and YouTube, especially around nudity and “how sexy” the vibe would feel, and what we actually saw on the ground.
A big part of our trip is the practical stuff people don’t always say out loud. We cover the check-in sales pitch, why the rooms felt more “comfortable” than “luxury,” and how easy it is to overspend if you’re not careful. Yes, we tell the full story of the accidental $300 bottle of wine, plus what we loved eating (get the grilled shrimp) and what we’d happily skip next time (water nachos). We also break down our boudoir photo shoot day, including the makeup shock that looked wild in person and perfect in the final photos.
Then we go deeper into the hardest moment of the vacation: an assumed kiss that didn’t have consent behind it. We process what happened, how alcohol and separation played into it, and what we learned about verbal check-ins, four-way connection, and why “the setting” never equals permission. If you’re planning a couples trip to a clothing optional resort in Mexico, this is the kind of conversation that can make your next vacation safer, clearer, and honestly hotter. Subscribe, share with a friend who’s curious, and reach out to us with your biggest “what should I expect?” question.
Email us at podcast@unpluggedandturnedon.com - we'd love to hear from you!
Unplugged Intro And Quick Shoutouts
SPEAKER_01This is unplugged and turned on, where we drop the masks, challenge the rules, and explore what connection, desire, and relationships really look like beneath the surface. This is an adult podcast and it's not intended for anyone under the age of 18. So if you're under 18, go find something else to listen to. I'm Neil.
SPEAKER_00And I'm Trinity. And together we're getting into the real stuff: attraction, intimacy, communication, and the moments that actually create chemistry.
SPEAKER_01No scripts, no pretending. Just honest conversations about what turns us on. Mentally, emotionally, and physically. So go ahead. Unplug a little.
SPEAKER_00And let's turn something on. Well, hello, everybody. I'm Neo. And I'm Trinity. And we are back. Just kind of catching up a little bit, but a few quick notes, I think, before we get started. First, I wanted to give a huge shout out to the very sexy podcasters, Brad and Brittany.
SPEAKER_01Very sexy.
SPEAKER_00Yes. Like if you have not heard their podcast before, it's called The Sexy Swinging Vampires. Ooh. Yeah, but I figure if you were listening to ours, you definitely know them because they're defin they're bigger than us. Um we met them on a Bliss Cruise, uh, our first Bliss Cruise way back in when was that? February of 2026. Yeah, and then we saw them at a kind of a hotel-ish takeover. Uh, met them up, met uh up with them again.
SPEAKER_01Yeah. What what a fun, sexy couple.
SPEAKER_00Yeah, he's tall. I think he I think he's taller than me.
SPEAKER_01He's got great hamstrings and quads. I tested them out.
SPEAKER_00I'm still trying to figure out if I do, but oh, you do in the water. Yeah. Um, anyways, it was quite the surprise to listen to their latest podcast and heard them talk about us. And I laughed because they talked about Trinity's sexy voice. And you know.
SPEAKER_01That was so sweet.
SPEAKER_00That's right. Vampires. So I will say that. Like, that's the kind of term that they brought from the previous podcast and into this new one. And vampires being like once bitten, always a vampire, synonymous with lifestyle, um, you know, life. I still think we're like the um we're the minority of vampires and that we don't go out at night. I feel like we're in bed, we're in bed early.
SPEAKER_01We need to like come up with like we need to think more on that. We do, but uh, you know we're like a sub a sub-vampire group of oh, but I do like um Brit Brittany Brittany Bitch mentions like naked before nine.
SPEAKER_00Naked by nine.
SPEAKER_01Naked by nine. Right. And I'm a hundred percent behind that.
SPEAKER_00I'm that kind of vampire. Naked by nine. What the hell are we doing? That's right. And I will always say Brad and Brittany, because I will I will never use that other word.
SPEAKER_01I know. Yeah, I know.
SPEAKER_00I'm not gonna call anybody else a bitch, but I get it.
SPEAKER_01But Britney Spears, that's what she's Britney bitch.
SPEAKER_00So, anyways, if you have not checked out their podcast, do that again. The sexy swinging vampires. Great couple, great, hopefully get to do an episode with them sometime. Yeah, they're very interesting. Um, and then beyond that, uh just a quick reminder: like, hey, if you are still out there, you do like us, like, subscribe, send us some fan mail, leave a review, whatever. But again, I think Trinity said this last time. She only wants to read good reviews. So if you got something negative to say, just you know, say it to a wall or something.
SPEAKER_01Well, I and I have no problem deleting something. What? Sending it to the trash. But also we Yeah. We're sensitive. We're peep, we are people. Um, I'm not gonna speak perfectly all the time. I'm gonna not dot my I's and cross my T's.
SPEAKER_00I think she will, though. If you knew her, she does that.
SPEAKER_01Proofread.
SPEAKER_00But she also mentioned that hey, if you send a request for her to read you a bedtime story, she might just do that. I will read you, I'll read that bedtime story. So, anyways, like, subscribe, leave us some comments, share us with friends in many ways, and enjoy the show.
SPEAKER_01Yeah, enjoy.
Picking The Right Desire Resort
SPEAKER_00So today we are going to talk about our trip to Desire Riviera Maya.
SPEAKER_01And when did we go?
SPEAKER_00We went April, yeah. That was after the Bliss Cruise.
SPEAKER_01We had intended or initially planned to go to Desire Pearl in November, the previous November.
SPEAKER_00Yeah.
SPEAKER_01Uh plans changed.
SPEAKER_00Plans changed. We decided that wasn't the ideal time for us. And I think we had heard the contrast between Temptations, Desire Riviera Maya, Desire Pearl, and we're like, you know what? Desire Riviera Maya sounded like more us from what all of the stuff we've researched and all the conversations we've had with people. Really, I'll I'll give you our quick breakdown. Temptations being like the spring break crowd, topless, large event, large place. Uh Desire Pearl being a little bit smaller venue, maybe a little bit older crowd, but I think a quieter, more relaxing place. So two two polar and two polar opposites, and then desire Riviera falling somewhere in the middle, and that's what we found.
SPEAKER_01Yeah. And in that decision making, uh hedonism too was part of that initially.
SPEAKER_02Yeah.
SPEAKER_01And we ruled that out just based off many many factors. But we will get there at some point.
SPEAKER_00We definitely will be curious. And I think what what's funny about all of this is we have we had I think the discussion around going to a fully nude hotel started at the very beginning before we went to a house party, before we started thinking about lifestyle. Oh, yeah. It was let's go somewhere and get naked. Yeah. And that's yeah. Yeah.
SPEAKER_01That's the very first thing.
SPEAKER_00Right.
SPEAKER_01And then it took us a year and something to get there.
SPEAKER_00A little bit over a year, and we had done so much in the lifestyle before then. So that was kind of the funny part. It was the first piece of talking about going out and getting naked somewhere, and then it was the last place that we ended up after, you know, house parties.
SPEAKER_01There's a lot of fillers, cruises, and all yeah, a lot of experiences.
SPEAKER_00Okay, so let's talk about Desire Riviera Maya. We did when did we go? Monday to Saturday, Sunday to Friday. I don't know. We did like five full days there.
SPEAKER_01Yeah, we did yeah, we backed it off a little bit. Initially, we were gonna be there at Pearl a week, and then we curtailed that a little bit. We whittled that down of like, hey, based on our experiences, who we are, this will work. And also cost because cost there was a difference. Timing cost from place to place. There's a lot of variables.
SPEAKER_00Yeah, I think that was as we go through this, that was the only negative, it's just the cost to go to desire resorts. I think even hedonism is crazy.
SPEAKER_01Unreal.
SPEAKER_00Crazy. Yeah.
SPEAKER_01I feel like I'm gonna book this next time we go, I'm going to be in Bolivia checking out that new cat. Um anyway, I digress. Um Google it back. I'll be somewhere else that is not in the States to see if I get a cheaper rate.
SPEAKER_00Yeah. Good grief. Right. I know. It it's it is expensive, but I would say it was a great resort. Like it was nice. Oh my gosh, it was beautiful.
SPEAKER_01It was the first rainforest because it's on the Yucatan plane.
SPEAKER_00Oh, yeah, so let's talk about getting there.
Getting There Through The Jungle Drive
SPEAKER_01Oh, yeah.
SPEAKER_00Yeah, so we flew in, but I think like you you get into a taxi or something to get you there. Shuttle, taxi, shuttle, taxi. Yeah. Uh USA Transfers. That's a very popular one for people going to um that was a good thing. Highly recommend.
SPEAKER_01It was great.
SPEAKER_00Um, we don't get any kickbacks, but USA Transfers, great place.
SPEAKER_01No, we are not getting money from anybody.
SPEAKER_00Um but you're driving along the highway for I don't know, 20 minutes or so, and then you make this left off the highway into like a guard kind of station and gate. And what you don't realize is that once you go through there, it's still like two or three miles to the resort, but it's this straight shot through some kind of dense jungle-like stuff. So they so you can't you can't see.
SPEAKER_01Well, we can't see on your left. We can see as far as the horizon will let you.
SPEAKER_00That's right.
SPEAKER_01Um, this is very dense.
SPEAKER_00You you just yeah.
SPEAKER_01Yeah. Uh rainforest and um the vehicle and the road ahead of you and behind you. That's it.
SPEAKER_00That's it. And then you thought you might have seen some kind of ape or there was something in there.
SPEAKER_01It was moving around looking at me.
SPEAKER_00But later you might have thought of that it was a Kwadi. Yeah. Maybe. Yeah. Yeah.
Expectations Vs Reality On Nudity
SPEAKER_00Okay, so what what did you think the resort was gonna be like? Did you have any preconceived notions around that?
SPEAKER_01I felt uh we had listened to many podcasts.
SPEAKER_00Many podcasts.
SPEAKER_01Maybe some YouTube videos um leading up to that time, and it fit my expectations.
SPEAKER_00Yeah.
SPEAKER_01Okay. Like there was nothing that caught me off guard, I was disappointed with or super shocked about. It was I mean, the only thing I think that was I didn't realize was the number of food options, restaurants that they had on site.
SPEAKER_00Oh, yeah.
SPEAKER_01Was more than I anticipated.
SPEAKER_00And good.
SPEAKER_01Yeah, good.
SPEAKER_00Yeah. What did I think it was gonna be like?
SPEAKER_01Yeah, I can't wait to hear this.
SPEAKER_00I really thought that would be I think as even as we talk more throughout, you know, our experience there, like I expected more I don't know, people doing stuff around the pool or on the hot tub, that kind of stuff.
SPEAKER_01I thought I thought you meant facility-wise.
SPEAKER_00Facility-wise, I think it met my expectations. What I didn't like about um Riviera Maya, though, and I think Pearl is the is what I was expecting, was you didn't really have a balcony. Your balcony was the shared space between the rooms on that floor.
SPEAKER_01Yeah, I'm not sure if that was for everyone or just the type we had ocean view room, and maybe that was As I looked around.
SPEAKER_00Most were like that.
SPEAKER_01There may have been some that had a uh a balcony, but I think most of them were like our neighbors along that little stretch in the building, they had more of a veranda than we did.
SPEAKER_00We did not they it was a little bubble out.
SPEAKER_01Yeah, but they sat there and had coffee, but we walked through their coffee and sitting there. But we did not have that.
SPEAKER_00But I think we could have. That whole area was common space, for a fee. Common space, yeah. Um, I think that was it. The other piece, you know, I'll probably mention throughout, but anyways, I expected more naked people. I think as we had listened to other podcasts, it was like you feel awkward if you're not naked because there's so many people naked. And I would say from our experience, it was probably 15% that were totally nude, 20% totally nude, a lot of topless, and then a lot of people still fully clothed. I mean like full bikini.
SPEAKER_01It's not like most people were fully clothed.
SPEAKER_00Yeah, okay. There's a lot of topless, though.
SPEAKER_01And some topless barely any nude.
SPEAKER_00Yeah, and I was shocked by that because I think what that does then is then makes those people that go fully nude or those that want to try being fully nude, like feel awkward about it because not everybody is. Yeah, but I still did it.
SPEAKER_02Yeah, you did.
SPEAKER_00I did by the pool.
SPEAKER_02Yeah, yeah.
SPEAKER_00But I think that's that's what surprised me. My expectation was more naked people, and what I found was not many naked people.
SPEAKER_01I will say one thing I realized um as we're talking about this, I was surprised that the room rooms, at least the one we had, wasn't nicer because it was it was fine. It was absolutely exactly what we needed. I didn't need anything more.
SPEAKER_02Yeah.
SPEAKER_01Um but when we were doing like our information gathering around HEDO and a desire place, the big discrepancy was, oh, geez, they're a world country, or blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah.
SPEAKER_00Like a Howard Johnson or whatever.
SPEAKER_01Like whatever. Uh HEDO. And if you really want it just like luxury and go to whatever desire. And I'm like, it was I mean, yeah. It was day like a Hilton.
SPEAKER_00I it was like a three-star hotel in the world.
SPEAKER_01It wasn't over the top, it wasn't super abundant luxury. Yeah, it was as expected, good enough.
SPEAKER_00It was a room.
SPEAKER_01Yes, yeah. Yes, it was.
SPEAKER_00Yeah. Um okay.
Check In And The Timeshare Pitch
SPEAKER_00So we got to here's I think everybody will talk about this if you hear about it. When you get to the resort, you go to check into your room, they're going to try to sell you something. They're going to try to because it is like a timeshare environment, so they will try to do that. And we've heard that they can be really annoying about that. What we found was they asked and they kept trying to talk us into it a little bit. And they're like, hey, we're gonna go ahead and um set you up with uh with uh appointment, maybe a massage, I forget.
SPEAKER_01And Trinity's like, you can schedule it, that's fine, but yeah, it just kept pushing, pushing, pushing, and I understand, I understand. There's a commission, the person gets money for this. I get it. Expectation for their job.
SPEAKER_02It's his life. Right.
SPEAKER_01I uh was like, hey, I'll be real honest with you. You can schedule this appointment, we will not be there.
SPEAKER_00Yeah, that was awesome.
SPEAKER_01And you can do it if it makes you happy, and that's the answer that you need to have to let us out of here to get into a room, go ahead and do it. Yeah, we won't be there. Peace out.
SPEAKER_00We will not be there. Yeah, and I think once you said that, that was it. Like it was it was no more.
SPEAKER_01We had a bad experience. No, it wasn't bad, but we had a uh surprising experience in Mexico before that.
SPEAKER_00Puerto Vallarta, yeah.
SPEAKER_01Say no, it's okay to say no, no is no, is no.
SPEAKER_00That's right.
SPEAKER_01So that's what I did.
SPEAKER_00That's right. I'm not doing it, and they never bothered us. Not why I'm here. Yeah, that was good. Um, so yeah, we got checked in.
Pools And The Resort Daily Rhythm
SPEAKER_00I think we went down to the pool.
SPEAKER_01We we walked around a little bit. Yeah, that's right. We it's really important for us to get oriented, get our bearings. What's it look like? How's it feel?
SPEAKER_02Yeah.
SPEAKER_01Drop our stuff off and immediately get immersed in something.
SPEAKER_00Yeah, and I think the first day, I think we went to the quieter pool. And so they have two pools: one main pool area that's right outside the main lobby. That's where the game makers are. That's where the game makers are. All the music is at. They got some a restaurant right next to it, the little grill that does shrimp right by it. So it's like the main hangout. And it's really a nice place.
SPEAKER_02It is.
SPEAKER_00Um being us, we wanted to be, I think, uh in the quieter area just to kind of uh settle in. Um, so we went over to the quieter pool, which was nice, but I would tell you, like, we got in and out of the pool, in and out of the pool because the pool was like one. I I wrote this down, it was like one to two degrees cooler than the hot tub.
SPEAKER_01It was so warm. Yeah, it is it's pretty shallow. Yeah. And because of that and the climate and the temperature, it you know, it doesn't take a little bit. So what do you think?
SPEAKER_00Maybe three and a half, four feet deep. Like it was shallow.
SPEAKER_01It's short, yeah. It's small.
SPEAKER_00But we hung out there in and out of the pool. Um, I think we went to dinner that night.
SPEAKER_01We spent the most time there. We did spend a lot of time at the other pool too, but we spent probably the most time at the quiet pool. I think if in the end we split 50-50. 50-50.
SPEAKER_00We did two days, I think, at the quiet pool and then two days at the party pool.
SPEAKER_01I l I enjoyed both.
SPEAKER_00Yes, me too. I do wish the pool was cooler. I mean, no kidding. We're warm. Drop some ice blocks in there at the beginning of the day or something.
SPEAKER_01Like, how do you cool off? Get into the pool. No, honey, no, honey, no, no.
SPEAKER_02No.
SPEAKER_01We we were sitting at the pool, the the quiet pool, and we watched people get into it and they're like but it wasn't because it was cold. No, because you expect because I expected it to be cooler.
SPEAKER_00You were trying to cool down. Yeah. Um, yeah, so we did that. Uh, we went to dinner that night, I think it was Mediterranean. Some of some of the dinner stuff was hard to figure out, like, because they have a few places that you can go to, and then they have a uh main restaurant that you go to, and the first day I think it was like the location was weird. So we weren't really sure where to go.
SPEAKER_01The days it's open these things are open or not open. It you they give you a schedule, and you kind of have to live by that.
SPEAKER_00Yeah.
SPEAKER_01That's the one thing you have to have out. Otherwise, you keep adjusting what's open, what's not open. But anyway.
SPEAKER_00Oh, shoot, and I think I missed like at 4 30 in the afternoon.
SPEAKER_01Oh, yeah.
SPEAKER_00Everybody that's what you know, we talked about this, I think, in other shows, but there's like this flow to this place, and everyone does a thing at a different time and blah, blah, blah. And we don't really do that, but the first day we gave that, we gave it a I think we followed the schedule the best we could the first day. That was the only time.
SPEAKER_01Because we arrived and we just plugged in.
SPEAKER_00Yeah. So at 4 30, everyone kind of migrates to the big hot tub on the roof um outside of the main pool. So we went there, had some drinks. We did see some sexy stuff, but not a whole lot. But we saw some lady getting eaten out by a couple different guys on the side.
SPEAKER_01It was hot. And I'm like, yeah, this is why we came here.
SPEAKER_00That's right.
SPEAKER_01And then we never saw that again.
SPEAKER_00We never saw that again. There was we saw somebody having sex on the edge of the hot tub, and I only remember that because the water kept shooting out.
SPEAKER_01Oh, that couple. Yeah. That was the quiet pool.
SPEAKER_00No, that wasn't the quiet pool.
SPEAKER_01The quiet pool, there was some like branch apparent happening in there.
SPEAKER_00It was on a cabana.
SPEAKER_01No, in the quiet pool. I remember that.
SPEAKER_00This was happening pretty much right where everyone got in and out of the hot tub. Um the hot tub. And there was that's what I was saying. It was like splashing water in and out and everywhere, and I think that was day one. And then somebody else had gone over to one of the far end cabanas and we're having sex. But I did expect a lot more. I didn't see that. Um truth be told, like the flow is like uh hang out during the day. Um 4 30, go to the hot tub. Sometime maybe around 6, uh, start getting ready for dinner, maybe. Go to dinner about 7 o'clock or something. Then there's a show or something downstairs at like 10, 10 o'clock, 10 30, um, that the staff puts on, supposedly pretty hot. We didn't go once. Um, and then about 11 o'clock, the club upstairs opens for dancing. And I think the playrooms open at the same time. We day one, we kind of did most of that. We did not catch the show.
SPEAKER_01I wonder if day one the dancing happened earlier, because man, like I don't think we could have regrouped enough to do something at late.
SPEAKER_00I don't know. But we that was the only night we went to the club. We went dancing at night. It was it was nice, but at the same time, it was it was hot. I do remember that. Um, there wasn't a lot of people in the club. No, because there wasn't a lot of people in the club, and I had to I think between the travel and the lack of sleep and the alcohol that day, like I had a headache.
SPEAKER_01I had to go.
SPEAKER_00Yeah, so we had cut that day short and got a bed. Sorry, people. Sorry to bore you with that.
SPEAKER_01Like that exciting, but I feel like the next time we go.
SPEAKER_00The next time we go.
SPEAKER_01We've ha we've done the right the initial Yeah. We know we know what to expect.
SPEAKER_00Yeah. Yep.
SPEAKER_01But also the next time we go, anytime I say the next time we go, we're bringing a crew of people.
SPEAKER_00I know. I think that's we that's what we figured out even on the Bliss Cruise. Like if we went with friends, it would be a whole lot better. Um at least for us. Like that you go with the crew. Uh doesn't mean you have to hang out together the whole time.
SPEAKER_01But having like home base talking about it.
SPEAKER_00A little home base stuff.
SPEAKER_01Get yeah. Ramp each other up.
SPEAKER_00Yeah. Day two.
Beach Cabana Fun And The Tip Shakedown
SPEAKER_00Um we hung out, I think maybe that's when we hung out by the Quield. I don't even know.
SPEAKER_01We were right outside um this really cute outdoor bar that had swings. Um I really enjoyed that. Um basically our own bartender. Yeah.
SPEAKER_00Yeah. Yeah. That was nice.
SPEAKER_01We brought we brought our own cups. Yep. Or whatever.
SPEAKER_00We brought our own cups, um, took tips, took tip money. Yeah. But Tuesday was a little chill. I think we did the quiet pool that day. Um got coffee at the little coffee stand. Um the coffee stand's cool.
SPEAKER_01Yeah. I think we went to the gym, we did work out a couple times. Yep.
SPEAKER_00And I think the highlight of day two, really, the only thing that I would share is that's when we went out to the cabana that night on the beach.
SPEAKER_01Oh my gosh.
SPEAKER_00We did a little solo Was it solo?
SPEAKER_01Yeah. And the guy should like was a hey.
SPEAKER_00Yeah, but I'll get to that. I'll get to that. But yeah, it was mutual solo play. I think part of that was because of the sand. Like, you don't want to get sand in weird places, right?
SPEAKER_01No doubt. I have not had the displeasure of playing with sand. Um reminds me of a friend of ours that were like, yeah, when we first got together, we had sex on the beach, and we will never do that again. And now I'm thinking, mm-hmm.
SPEAKER_00No, no, no sand.
SPEAKER_01You get a single grain.
SPEAKER_00That's right.
SPEAKER_01All bets off. Yeah, nothing sexy about sand.
SPEAKER_00So we had some fun in a commander on the beach, because you know, that's kind of what you do there, and what we've heard you do there, and that was nice because it's right by the sound. Yeah. And then we had this, we as we were doing that, we saw this guard kind of walk by patrolling the beach. Um and we're like, okay, he probably sees this stuff all the time, so off he goes. And then probably like five, ten minutes later, he comes back, and you know, we're kind of naked still, you know, and he shows Trinity his phone, and I'm like, what is that? And she's like, Google Translate. Google Translate that said, you know, basically, he he would appreciate a tip for keeping us, and I say this in quotes keeping us safe on the beach. So, in other words, getting shaked down.
SPEAKER_01Like, you heathens shouldn't be on the beach doing this.
SPEAKER_00That's right. So you I know where you're at, and you know where you're at, but it's still illegal, and I'd like some cash.
SPEAKER_01Yeah, and I'm like, you're right, you're right. We shouldn't be doing this.
SPEAKER_00So getting into the shakedown, big guy.
SPEAKER_01Neo and Trinity are good.
SPEAKER_00That's right.
SPEAKER_01Good boy, good girl.
SPEAKER_00You're such a good girl.
SPEAKER_01Thank you.
SPEAKER_00So I think that wrapped up our day two, day three.
Photo Shoot Day And Makeup Shock
SPEAKER_00Um, that's when we did the photo shoot. So I will say we started out the morning, went to the gym, gym was hot, but night temperature hot, warm, wasn't unbearable. No, yeah. But we want to, you know, stay as fit as we possibly can, um, even on vacation.
SPEAKER_01Doing day drinking and night drinking. It's very difficult to balance those two. I'm literally doing some day drinking right now with some prosecco in my blueberry mint, lemon mint mix. That's right. Yeah, because we have something planned for later. That's right. And I'm doing a podcast and I need to CTFO.
SPEAKER_00Chill the fuck out.
SPEAKER_01Thank you.
SPEAKER_00I got that.
SPEAKER_01I'm really terrible at those.
SPEAKER_00I'm very good with acronymage, but that's the world I live in, so yeah. Um yeah, so we did a photo shoot that day. Oh, I do want to talk about though that we went to the gym. There's a coffee shop right there. And then by the coffee shop, they had all this whole family of raccoons, and it was so freaking cute.
SPEAKER_01We never saw them again, damn it.
SPEAKER_00Oh, that sucked.
SPEAKER_01The rest of the time we were there. I don't know about you, but I was looking for that.
SPEAKER_00I was too. I wanted to see the raccoons.
SPEAKER_01Where we live, we don't really see them. And I'm like, let me see these little trash pandas.
SPEAKER_00It was cute. And then they had this big, big, big Kowadi.
SPEAKER_01Oh, he was cool.
SPEAKER_00Look it up what it is. I was trying to figure out what the hell it was. It but he had this big ass tail. He was huge, he was huge, but and so sweet. They were feeding him, yeah.
SPEAKER_01So sweet, loved fruit.
SPEAKER_00That's right. And then we had this other little cat friend that we called Blanco.
SPEAKER_01We called him Blanco.
SPEAKER_00He was a black cat, but we called him Blanco. If you get it, you get it. That's okay. And then we did a photo shoot, which was really awesome.
SPEAKER_01I was very nervous about the photo shoot, and the older couple that we had met, I had told her. Oh, good God.
SPEAKER_00Marilyn couple. I told yeah, the couple that we've met.
SPEAKER_01We kept seeing them all the time. They were so sweet. They were checking in with us.
SPEAKER_00I gotta say something here. Oh this is where I I always joke with Trinity because she will always talk. I I say she always talks to the safe people. So we're at dinner the first night, and I have to go off to the bathroom and I come back, and she's just fully engaged with this couple next to us. And hey, no problem. But they're like 70, 75 years old.
SPEAKER_01Late, 70, mid to late, yeah.
SPEAKER_00Could be 80. Um fully engaged in that company.
SPEAKER_01But you know what? They were sexing it up. They were, they've been going there for years, and then the one that had desire had closed.
SPEAKER_00I just never see Trinity like going up to smoking hot couples like us.
SPEAKER_01Well, I will say though, like us. Oh, you're so cute. Um, there's a difference between when couples are open, when people are open and closed, they were very open. I'm going to approach an open couple. If you're closed off, I'm gonna leave you the hell alone.
SPEAKER_00Yeah. So back to Marilyn and the photo shoes.
SPEAKER_01Yeah. Oh, I just smacked. I'm so sorry. I'm so sorry. Um that's okay.
SPEAKER_00You're still a good girl.
SPEAKER_01Thank you. Uh she I was really nervous. Like, what do I what do I wear? What do I so I brought several outfits? Um she said, you know what? I did one. I've done a few, I've done them. They're gonna make you feel very comfortable. Don't worry, like basically in a very nice way. Don't worry about it, they're gonna take care of you. And I will say that's exactly what happened.
SPEAKER_00Yeah, it was good.
SPEAKER_01Um our photographer, I showed him what I was what I brought, and he selected some items um and kind of went from there. Like he's looking through his eyes of like, this is what I can see. So he's the creative with that, and I just kind of let that be.
SPEAKER_00Yep, that was good. Let's talk about the makeup.
SPEAKER_01Oh gosh, I was never had my makeup done by somebody.
SPEAKER_00Um it was crazy because it looked like because I had to go get money for it. I didn't realize, hey, you it's a separate card or whatever, so I had to go off to the ATM and that was a whole fiasco, but eventually got the money out. But I come back and Trinity is all done up, and I have never seen so much makeup on her face in my life.
SPEAKER_01There's like pound a pound of makeup on me.
SPEAKER_00And I knew what her reaction was gonna be because I was kind of in shock too.
SPEAKER_01I am the girl, I am the girl next door.
SPEAKER_00Okay, I had to keep my face straight because I didn't want her to feel like.
SPEAKER_01You weren't doing a good job, by the way. Your eyes were like double, like, oh my god.
SPEAKER_00But it was on, like it was a lot of makeup. But what I would say is I was shocked because as we went into the shoot and then seeing the results from the shoot, like it was just right for the environment.
SPEAKER_01My makeup artist had a conversation with me. Yeah, she said, Do you wear makeup? Normally wear makeup, how much do you normally wear? And because this is a photo shoot, we're it's going to be more than you're used to because it needs to show up.
SPEAKER_00Yeah, it needs to be what she didn't say was like a hundred times more than you normally put on.
SPEAKER_01She put these false eyelashes on. Never have. And I couldn't even lift my eyes. I was like trying to lift my eye. She's like, okay, open your eyes. I'm trying.
unknownI'm trying my eyes.
SPEAKER_01Um when I first saw it in the mirror, I was like, Oh, I look like a drag queen. But it but in the pictures, it looks great.
SPEAKER_00You did look like a drag queen. But the pictures, you're right. That's why I was shocked. Like when the pictures came out, it was like the makeup was perfect.
SPEAKER_01Yeah, and you don't even notice it. It's the last you're looking at you're looking at my ass or something else, but you're still. You're not looking at my face. Um, but I initially I was like, oh god, what did I do? I did my own hair. It I didn't need someone to do it for me, but no, you didn't.
SPEAKER_00Yeah. I would have had that done, but okay. So anyway, so we did that.
SPEAKER_01Um you were you were asking me if I wanted it done. I'm like, nah.
SPEAKER_00Yep.
SPEAKER_01So basic, whatever.
SPEAKER_00Yeah. So that was the photo shoot. I think we went to lunch, had some pretty good sex in the room that day, took a nap, had sex. Then we went and um looked at the photos, picked out the ones that we wanted, all that good stuff.
SPEAKER_01That was hard.
SPEAKER_00Yeah, they show you so many and they're all good. And you're like, First, you're like, I want them all.
SPEAKER_01Yes, no, yes, no.
SPEAKER_00First, you want them all, and then you see the price, and you're like, okay, let's go.
SPEAKER_01You're like, I want one. How much does one cost? Just kidding.
SPEAKER_00No, you're not.
SPEAKER_01I'm not.
SPEAKER_00I'm I'm a I'm cheap.
SPEAKER_01Yeah, I'm frugal.
SPEAKER_00But we picked that all the stuff out. We got those, we got all the photos, we got a little slideshow, whatever, and I still look at them and I love that one. All good, and it was expensive, I will just say that.
SPEAKER_01But it was also one of those happy birthday.
SPEAKER_00It's one of those things where you pay once because you you may never do that again.
SPEAKER_01Absolutely. Yeah.
SPEAKER_00And I will take photos of Trinity at home. Um, and I want to do more of that because I am a bit of a photographer, but it will never be us together like it was there. And that was really cool.
SPEAKER_01I love that.
SPEAKER_00Yeah.
SPEAKER_01Mm-hmm. The ones at us together. They're beautiful.
SPEAKER_00Um, so what else?
SPEAKER_01We have that was I was thinking it was gonna be uncomfortable?
SPEAKER_00No.
SPEAKER_01Or no, no. Um shorter amount of time. That took up like half a freaking day.
SPEAKER_00It was a third of the day. No, plan like three or four hours. Yeah, it's like four hours. Yeah. But it was worth it. It was worth it in the end. It kept things moving. We did photo shoots in um some of the the club area, the vestibule, kind of outside the club, the dark, in the play area, did some outside. The outside stuff wasn't necessarily our favorite. Like, hey, and then go get in the sand.
SPEAKER_01What about that mesh bathing suit?
SPEAKER_00Oh, the mesh bathing suit.
SPEAKER_01Like that's yeah, that's nice. But yes, yeah, yeah. The other ones were really, really spicy, right? So extra, extra spicy, which was surprising to me because I did not realize our photographer would be okay with some of that.
SPEAKER_00Well, yeah, and he took some explicit shots. I think he would have done more, but I wasn't sure how far to push the envelope.
SPEAKER_01And I'm looking at it.
SPEAKER_00And others had done it, and I'm like, yeah, so I don't know. Like, uh yeah. But we got some pretty, pretty dang spicy ones. Yeah. So that was fun.
SPEAKER_01But that was sort of like a almost a day for me that we that was our day at desire that was dedicated to photography.
SPEAKER_00And then
Food Highlights And The $300 Wine
SPEAKER_00and that was a very expensive day because that's also the night we went out and got dinner at Salo, I think the name of the restaurant was, which was good. But we get in there and they're like, Hey, this is good. Uh hand you the little wine list, and we love wine.
SPEAKER_01And we asked to get in pesos, of course.
SPEAKER_00Yeah, we looked and we're like, um, let's look at this. This looks good, whatever. And then the guy's like, Hey, yeah, you want to try some of this? This is really good. This is local Mexican wine, blah, blah, blah. So, anyways, the prices are in pesos. I know how to do the quick math because it's like divide by 20.
SPEAKER_01So, and Trinity is like, hmm. That looks good. Sounds good. Um, okay, carry the one uh-huh times two, okay. Yeah. Um, that kind of that kind of math. No, not no, no, not so good.
SPEAKER_00Picked this bottle of wine, and it was really good, but it also upgraded. Yes, as soon as she picked it, it's like, oh, well then why don't you go sit in this other spot for the you can get up and move ten steps over to this other table and our walking place. I'll tell you, like, that this was it. Our I think Trinity thought our bottle of wine was gonna cost thirty dollars. It cost three hundred dollars.
SPEAKER_01Thirty dollars.
SPEAKER_00I'm like, forgot to carry the extra zero.
SPEAKER_01Thirty dollars is manageable.
SPEAKER_00And and I will just say, like, it was a good bottle of wine, and I bought some more when we got home, but when I bought it when we got home, it was eighty dollars, not three hundred dollars, not the desire, revere, Maya markup price for a bottle of wine.
SPEAKER_01That was the most had a stroke. I'm like, we're gonna get up, we're gonna walk to the other table. I have no problem doing that.
SPEAKER_00You don't, and I said, No.
SPEAKER_01I got no shame.
SPEAKER_00And I said, no, we're just gonna sit here and eat. So we we did enjoy our dinner there. We did enjoy the wine, it was expensive.
SPEAKER_01I don't know, sexy stuff on the TV in front of us.
SPEAKER_00Yes, I did like that.
SPEAKER_01What was going on there?
SPEAKER_00I did like that. That was the ambiance. Um, in the end, I think we ate at Salo, we ate at the sushi place twice.
SPEAKER_01Oh, I love sushi though.
SPEAKER_00Yeah, we do. It was good. Um, and then at the normal buffet-ish type restaurant. We also had they had this grill outside um where they grilled shrimp. That was so good.
SPEAKER_01Grilled shrimp was good. If that nachos, they were like, don't get the nachos.
SPEAKER_00That is were nachos aficionados were snobs about the water nachos.
SPEAKER_01I don't know what water not like imagine water nachos doesn't water nachos doesn't seem like it would be good. Water nachos. Water nachos. Watered down cheese. Yeah, like nachos cheese itself is sort of like a mystery. Um, and then you add some water to it, and it's like a mystery that's been hit by a hurricane.
SPEAKER_00Gross. So I think that was a lot of the highlights. We never went to um the late night spa, and that's supposed to be really hot. Like people go to the club and then they all like switch into their um either naked or whatever, and then there's a lot of shenanigans.
SPEAKER_01Did we ever go there to shenanigans spa time?
SPEAKER_00Yeah.
SPEAKER_01There's gonna have to be some caffeine coursing through my veins.
SPEAKER_00Oh, and did you know we're at 8 p.m. But we also found out that espresso martinis have the most calories. So if you want to try to have a drink to keep you awake and think espresso martinis are gonna do that, if you don't care about calories, that's great.
SPEAKER_01Just bypass that, get a rip.
SPEAKER_00If people care about calories, you you probably didn't want to hear me mention that. That was just funny. Such a so sad. No, I can't have
Spa Time And Choosing Nightlife
SPEAKER_00one. We did go to the spa one afternoon at like 4 30 and have the place to ourselves, like or not 4 30, sorry. It was probably like 7 p.m.
SPEAKER_01Yeah, it was basically our prime.
SPEAKER_00Normal time that we want to go to the spa, yeah. So we went at like seven, we had it the place to ourselves. There was people that would walk in and out. Um, I think mostly they were meandering around until 10 o'clock waiting for the show. So we were we were probably in there at eight or nine.
SPEAKER_01We had the bartender to ourselves.
SPEAKER_00We had the bartender to ourselves. That was fantastic.
SPEAKER_01He's like, I'll give you whatever you want.
SPEAKER_00That's right. So that was good. Um, we were gonna play on a cabana, um, just uh just to do it, I think. Mm-hmm. Started, and we're like, why are we doing this? Just to just hear, or we could go back to the room and have a lot more fun. So we went back to the room and had our own fun there.
SPEAKER_01Oh, yeah. That was phenomenal.
SPEAKER_00Yes, that was phenomenal.
SPEAKER_01And then it was phenomenal and then fantastic and wonderful.
SPEAKER_00Yes, it was because it was it was like Energizer Bunny Night.
SPEAKER_01Yeah, it was Energizer Bunny Night.
SPEAKER_00Um, one other piece that I want to talk about, and it'll get into our next topic, which is really about consent.
When Consent Gets Assumed
SPEAKER_00So I'll talk about this one, and this one was the rough part of our adventure. Um there was a couple that um are known in the community.
SPEAKER_01We had anticipated um connecting with them when they arrived.
SPEAKER_00Yeah, they mentioned that they were coming, they are part of the community, well-known couple. I won't say anything more about that because I don't want to identify anybody.
SPEAKER_01Um but we were looking out for them. You had um there's a telegram uh conversation, I don't know, anyway.
SPEAKER_00We saw them in the hot tub, um, went up and talked with them, hung out with them for quite a while, um, and some other people. Yeah, quite a few other time.
SPEAKER_01Quite a few other people.
SPEAKER_00Had a good had a good time talking in um in the spa with them, got a little bit separated, I think, and I thought you know we were all okay. I was talking to her.
SPEAKER_01Just a big group of people.
SPEAKER_00There's a big group of people. I was talking to her a lot.
SPEAKER_01The missus of the missus of this couple.
SPEAKER_00Um, there was another guy that was him and his wife were brand new to lifestyle. They were um there, so he was kind of talking in and out, but I was spending a lot of time talking with her. Um, I was looking over and I would see Trinity kind of in the center of people, just talking.
SPEAKER_01Um being the social butterfly. Everyone and not really connecting to anyone, but just not interested.
SPEAKER_00No, there's not having a good time, but I kept looking over there, thinking all is well, um, trying to check in.
SPEAKER_01Yeah, it was fine. Fine.
SPEAKER_00So we did that, and then it was like, hey, let's go back to the room with this group of six of us and do some fireball shots.
SPEAKER_01Um, and we did that, um which was a traditional the couple that we had anticipated meeting, and that was something that they do.
SPEAKER_00Yeah. And I was looking forward to that. And we also body shots. Yeah, body shots, yeah. And then we actually ran into that really handsome guy, right? Guy in the elevator.
SPEAKER_01Yeah, we're like we somehow um convinced him to come into the room with us. Yeah, he was well dressed. He was waiting for his wife to she was getting ready for dinner as well. He was just kind of waiting for her.
SPEAKER_00So he came in and did a shot with us and then sadly disappeared. Yeah, but that's cool. So we did some uh Trinity and the other two ladies got a pretty awesome booty shot on the balcony. I love that. Um, we did some body shots. Um the one new couple did it off themselves. Uh the Mr. did off of Trinity. I did it off of the misses. We were just having a good time at that point. I think light uh we had been drinking a lot that day. Um so there was there was alcohol flowing, lots of margaritas and you know stuff. There it was. Um when we were getting ready to go, I asked the missus if I could kiss her.
SPEAKER_01And this is where I'm gonna interrupt a little bit. Yeah, go ahead, please. Like, so this this entire hot tub and room evening, like from my perspective, is um Neo is connecting with the missus here. Great. They went and got drinks at the bar. I'm kind of doing my own thing. I'm fine. I'm just letting him and the missus connect because that was sort of like not sort of, but it was something that we had discussed before. Was giving Neo the opportunity to flirt. And be open and kind of do be himself. Give him give him more opportunity and space. So that's what I was doing. I, on the other hand, was just holding space. Um, I kind of go back to like a story our friends had told us. I'm holding the drinks. I'm just I'm just the wing woman. I'm sitting there chatting about not sexy things with people. I'm just chatting, answering questions. Like, I don't know, I'm new, whatever. Just having conversations with many different people. That's what I was doing, allowing Neo and the Mrs. time to do their thing. And then with the body shot time in the room, they were doing body shots together. Still very fine. This is great. Whatever. The mister, the misses Mr. Hal was like, hey, I'll pick her. Well, obviously, because Neo and the Mrs. are like doing a thing.
SPEAKER_02Yeah.
SPEAKER_01Like, yeah, let them do a thing. Me and the Mr. have like no connection.
SPEAKER_00Yeah. Right.
SPEAKER_01Hey, I firmly stand by that.
SPEAKER_00Yes. Okay. Am I picking it back up? Please. Okay. So then we're getting ready to leave because it's time to go get dinner or whatever. So Trinity and I are leaving. Everyone's kind of breaking up and going off their own way. I'm there and I'm like, hey, uh, to the missus, can I kiss you? You know, goodbye, goodbye kiss. And that was really nice. I enjoyed that. And then I we started heading out, and the Mr. Kisses Trinity. And I don't really think anything of it at that moment. But that's really when things started to, or I don't think started to go wrong, but that's the finale. That was the grand finale.
SPEAKER_01The no moment that was never a choice for me.
SPEAKER_00And I think we walked out of there, and I, unbeloast to me, like the night had taken a very downward turn at that point.
SPEAKER_01You were like, oh, this was great. How wonderful. How fast in the elevator. And I'm like imploding. Like the walls are getting like my vision is tunneling. I'm like, oh God, what the fuck was that? Right. That was not okay.
SPEAKER_00Right.
SPEAKER_01But kind of held it together until we got to our room.
SPEAKER_00Held it together.
SPEAKER_01Trying to get ready for dinner.
SPEAKER_00Until we got back to our room. Um, yeah. We started getting ready for dinner. We never made it there. It the situation just blew up. Um I between the alcohol, between the events, all of that, it was just, it had reached a crescendo, and Trinity just lost it. And you know, I think when like throughout the day, when I'm we're we're kind of hanging out together, a little bit separated, watching each other, like I'm not picking up on anything. So all of that really caught me off guard. Um, but that was really the end of the night. It it blew up. We had a lot of yelling.
SPEAKER_01Well, I was very emotional. Yes. I think what I and I don't know if this is historically accurate, but you said something like, wasn't that a great night? Well, that was so much fun. That was great. And I just looked at him like no.
SPEAKER_00Yeah.
SPEAKER_01That was not okay.
SPEAKER_00Right.
SPEAKER_01That was not because we had two completely different experiences, right? Which is okay. Our experiences were different. And I did not I at the time expected you to know everything, and but we never connected in this the hot tub for you to have any inkling of an a notion that I was like, ugh, this this is I'm just holding the line. This is kind of sucky for me, but that's okay. Like you had no idea. You were thinking I was having a great time too. Yeah, um, and you did not know with me and the mister what the situation was.
SPEAKER_00Absolutely not.
SPEAKER_01Because you were over having your own experience.
SPEAKER_00Um but I would say like that night really blew up. We fought, talked, hugged, yelled, cried, but we came back together and worked through it.
SPEAKER_01The this the lifestyle isn't all pretty.
SPEAKER_00No, and I that's why I want to share this story because that was like I the two different experiences thing was a thing, and I didn't realize it. And I would say, you know, before this, I never let myself go off and talk to anybody. I kind of told myself, hey, I want to be able to, I want to feel like being able to do that, and I did it, and it felt good, and then it all blew up. So it's like maybe it wasn't good, all of that. But we had to work through that, and we did, and we came back together that night, a lot of talking, didn't make it to dinner, went to bed after that, but we came back. But what I wanted to really focus on from that, and yes, like not everything is sunshine and roses in the lifestyle. There is a there is bumps, there is bruises. Um, but around consent.
SPEAKER_01Yeah. Because I we we talk we talk about it all the time, yeah. But like, would what is it? What does it really look like?
SPEAKER_00What is it? What does it look like? And I think there's a lot more assumed consent than people realize. And you know, I think when the Mr. kissed Trinity, it was like there was no consent given, there was no indication of consent. There was no for me. Right.
SPEAKER_01Like it just happened. Like the body shot, yeah. I'm the one. I chose to get it was a bathtub. I chose to crawl into this little bathtub. Yeah. I yeah, that was fine. I had some choice. I knew it was coming. The kiss was completely no longer.
SPEAKER_00Yeah, and I think you first remember alcohol, all this stuff. You first thought it was me because he was tall too.
SPEAKER_01Yeah, standing over like right next to me and over me. And I, of course, am like, I'm on like, well, I'm just here, just I'm just here holding everyone's drink. Um looking around, like, just here in this room, and not really focused on this human right next to me.
SPEAKER_00Right. Yeah. So I had asked her if I could kiss her because that's kind of what I know, what I expect.
SPEAKER_01I heard you. I heard you ask her.
SPEAKER_00Right, is this okay? And then none of that was reciprocated to you. And I think what I want to point that back to is, you know, you're at a lifestyle resort, people are flirting, people are naked, people are doing all kinds of sexy things, but none of that means you've got consent to do anything.
SPEAKER_01Even if you have done something with them before. Previously. The day before, two hours before.
SPEAKER_00Yeah. Yeah. And I think one of the things that caught me especially off guard was, you know, this is an experienced couple. They've been at this for a while. They're kind of known.
SPEAKER_01So you think you're our guard like lowers?
SPEAKER_00Yes. Okay. 100%.
SPEAKER_01And sure.
SPEAKER_00Yeah. So I think that's the only piece that we would really talk about is just like be cognizant of all things around consent. It's real and it should be required. Like consent is a thing. Is this okay? And don't on the flip side of that, like you also want that from people. You want the reassurance that this is okay, that you are welcome to do this, that you know you have choice and you don't want to force yourself on anybody, and you don't want anybody else to force themselves on you.
SPEAKER_01And I do want to put this in perspective. It was a kiss, it wasn't anything else, but it was the fact that I didn't even have a split second for knowledge. Like there was no, it just happened.
SPEAKER_00Yeah. Yeah. And I would talk about this as you know, a previous episode that we did on attunement. Like, attunement and consent are two different things. Like, you can read into the situation, you can see someone's body chemistry, you or body language, you can have well-established chemistry with this person, all of that. But it doesn't mean that you've got a yes.
SPEAKER_01Also, like if this person was truly attuned to me, would wholeheartedly have known this was a no.
SPEAKER_00Yeah.
SPEAKER_01She is not into me, she's not looking at me, we're not really connected in any way. She's looking at room, she's talking about to anyone else.
SPEAKER_00Yep.
unknownYeah.
SPEAKER_01Just because my missus is connected with the Mr. Neo. If my missus is connected with um Neo, doesn't mean that I know.
SPEAKER_00Yeah.
SPEAKER_01Mm-mm. Mm-mm.
SPEAKER_00Which is an interesting part of the lifestyle, too. Like that's the four-way connection. If it's not there, and if if there's only a two-way connection, it doesn't mean that there's something going to happen with the other two.
SPEAKER_01Yeah, there's there was a no.
SPEAKER_00Yeah.
SPEAKER_01It was a hard note. The moment, the moment we got into the hot tub.
SPEAKER_00Right.
SPEAKER_01I already knew.
SPEAKER_00I yeah, I think you were kind of giving that indication. And all I wanted to do really was hang out and talk with them and all that. Like for me, it wasn't going anywhere, anyways.
SPEAKER_01Yeah, we're just being, we were just being social, and it was yeah. So anyway, that was a lesson for us. I think even um the very light prep uh preparation for this podcast, we were talking about it. My thinking has even evolved since then a little bit. Um, but it's still, I feel like on this individual um of just carte blanche, like, yeah, I'm just gonna do this because this is what's this is what the room is doing, this is what everyone else is doing. Like, yeah, yeah. No.
SPEAKER_00So yeah. Yeah, lesson learned though.
SPEAKER_01And also I do take accountability for my my self-awareness, what was going on, yeah. Um the alcohol that's played a part, yeah. Um being and that's hard because I don't want you to be responsible for me. I'm responsible for me.
SPEAKER_00Uh, we're still responsible. I And we do. We're responsible for each other. Take care of each other. Absolutely. If I notice, definitely wasn't cued in.
SPEAKER_01You're you're my best, my best friend, my my sweetheart. And if I see that something's not right, you better watch out.
SPEAKER_00Oh, yeah, watch out. Honey badger gonna come out. Um and the last part I would say about consent too. There's so much put on this, but I think it can all I do really think like it can be sexy. Like asking someone, hey, can I can I kiss you? Like that can be pretty hot. So consent can be hot, but beyond can it be hot? Like, it should absolutely be required. So just remember that. Uh I also think for us it was a lesson too in staying connected throughout the day, regardless. Yeah, there's alcohol, but it's still finding those times when you come together and check in with each other and say, How are you feeling about this? How am I feeling about this? Trinity says said it multiple times, like she was totally okay with me and the misses, but I'm still like, I don't, I don't think I would enjoy that as much knowing that there is no four-way connection. So, yes, it was okay. I like to be able to flirt. That's still something I'm trying to push myself to. Um, but I also wouldn't, I don't want to assume that there's a four-way connection when there's not. So that's uh it it helps us improve our communication. It was a rough night, but I would also come back to did that make the whole trip bad, that one experience? And the answer is no. Like I we would definitely go back to desire Riviera Maya.
SPEAKER_01No, it didn't make the whole trip bad. I will say though, that we've had a lot of conversations afterward, constantly talking about it, yeah, um, being curious about it, how it's and that was months ago, months ago, half a year ago.
SPEAKER_00And we had some more today, just as we were getting ready for this.
SPEAKER_01Yeah, of like you mentioned about it now.
SPEAKER_00I'm still very cautious, right?
SPEAKER_01Our our emotions will change based on how we think about something. Yep, absolutely. That's okay.
SPEAKER_00Absolutely. Um yeah. Let's see. Do you think that that's changed any way in which we interact with other people?
SPEAKER_01You know, initially I thought it would. I I took on, oh man, so much shame and blame for myself for myself. Like I felt like I needed somebody, I needed to blame somebody. So I just kept like moving it around a little bit. Um, but for myself, like, oh I'm never drinking again, I'm never gonna do this again. Like I pulled it way back.
SPEAKER_02Right.
SPEAKER_01Um but I think uh also like all these are learn learning lessons to learn something about.
SPEAKER_02Yep.
SPEAKER_01Um I always go back like really reserved and protected.
SPEAKER_02Yeah.
SPEAKER_01Uh but as far as other people, I'm sure there's some learning that's happened around that. Um I don't know, just to be honest, like how obvious it is that I am patrolling that and checking on that. I'm sure there is some what's this person doing? Don't put don't put something out there.
SPEAKER_00Yeah.
SPEAKER_01How close are you standing? What's going on over here? Um just more self-protection. Yep. And being very clear, but also coming to you and saying, like, nah, this couple's uh thumbs up sideways, down, whatever.
SPEAKER_00Yeah.
SPEAKER_01Um we've talked about it.
SPEAKER_00Half up, half down. Yeah, absolutely. Yeah, that's good.
SPEAKER_01How about you? Um, I think it's because I don't want that for you. I don't want it to be like you're changed everything. You can't have that flirtation, all the things that you want to do, you don't have access to that because you have to worry about me.
SPEAKER_00No, I think like my big lesson there was more about don't just assume everything's okay, like just because it looks okay from five, ten feet away. Like make sure you're doing periodic verbal check-ins. So that reinforced that for me. Um because like I still feel like when we were there, I'm very proud of myself for being able to go and have a conversation with somebody else and flirt a little bit and all that. Like, because I pushed myself out there a little bit. You did a great job. I think I and and I so I was happy about that, but I would come back to I still should have come and verbally like checked in with you through throughout that periodically, not like every five minutes or something, but no, but like, hey, how are you doing? All of that.
SPEAKER_01Like, what do you think? How are you? Yeah, both of us. So that's that's our responsibility to each other. Yep.
Advice For Newbies And What To Expect
SPEAKER_00Okay, so coming out of that and just talking about desire, especially like desire for newbies, people that are thinking about going. Um, if somebody came up and said, Hey, we're thinking about going, what should we know? What would you tell them? Like, what was the biggest things they should know if thinking about good going to desire revere Maya in particular?
SPEAKER_01I think um, well, I say advice I would give would be like think about what you want to get out of the trip. What is the thing that you want to do?
SPEAKER_00What are you looking for?
SPEAKER_01Yeah, what are you looking for? And um let's see. Yeah, I think that one, that way you know, like that way you can kind of frame how you want to spend the time. Yeah, what do you want to do? Like, do you just want to fund? Are you there to get away? Are you there for quiet time?
unknownYeah.
SPEAKER_01Um, yeah.
SPEAKER_00I think what I would tell what I would tell people is um it is absolutely a um lifestyle-friendly resort. But as newbies, like you won't feel pressured to do anything you don't want to do. If you don't want to get naked, you certainly don't have to. Are you gonna stick out if you don't get naked? No. Um it's a great place to go and hang out. I would tell people the same thing that kind of we learned, which is if you want a like spring break party, still think about temptations. If you want something that's quieter, maybe nicer, go to Pearl. Desire Riviera was a mighty a nice place in between those two. And we really enjoyed it. And I would go back there. Yeah. But I still think it's back to food's good, location is good, all of that was good. Um, and you won't feel a lot of pressure.
SPEAKER_01Yeah, no, I would say like really low pressure.
SPEAKER_00And one thing I want to drop in really quick before I forget. We saw an alligator.
SPEAKER_01You saw an alligator.
SPEAKER_00Crocodile alligator in the water on the beach. So we've heard about them before. I saw one when we were eating lunch. That was pretty crazy. Now, now I just wanted to throw that in there because that was a crazy piece. And now back to you. What were you just newbies and going to desire?
SPEAKER_01Yeah, and it I'm sure I've heard this too. It depends on who's showing up.
SPEAKER_00Yep.
SPEAKER_01It's the whole thing.
SPEAKER_00Yeah, I think that's it.
SPEAKER_01Showing up is sort of the the culture of the resort.
SPEAKER_00Yeah.
SPEAKER_01Like, yeah, it depends on.
SPEAKER_00I'd like to go with a group, like that would be cool, like you said, you know, and that's what I kind of like. At least the idea of Hito, like they're group, there were so many group events there, and you so you pick really the group you want to be with, and then that's when you go.
SPEAKER_01Yeah.
SPEAKER_00Okay, quick, quick uh lightning round question Desire Riviera Maya, pool or beach.
Lightning Round And Game Maker Games
SPEAKER_00Um at Desire Riviera Maya.
SPEAKER_01Uh pool.
SPEAKER_00I know because the beach kind of sucked and it stunk a little bit. Don't go there for the beach. It didn't have a bunch of the whatever they call it, algae stuff on the beach. Like I went into the ocean once, that was cool. You gotta see some birds diving into the water, that was cool, but there's like not much beach.
SPEAKER_01We've been where there's been beautiful beaches. We love beaches.
SPEAKER_00That's not a beach place. It just happens to be on the ocean, but the beach sucked. Day or night?
SPEAKER_01Day.
SPEAKER_00I know. It's always gonna be the answer no matter where, though.
SPEAKER_01It's beautiful at sunshine.
SPEAKER_00Favorite theme night? I don't even remember what the themes were because we only went out and we packed for everything. One night, yeah. Um biggest surprise.
unknownBiggest surprise.
SPEAKER_00For me, that there were sexy. Yeah, lack of sexy sexy. And far less people naked than I expected.
SPEAKER_01Yeah, lack of sexy. More naturalist or nudist, uh, especially at the quiet pool at the time we were at. Um lack of lifestylers.
SPEAKER_00Something we'd skip next time.
SPEAKER_01The 300 bottle of wine? 100%?
SPEAKER_00No.
SPEAKER_01I will eat from the pool grill grilled shrimp. That's the one.
SPEAKER_00The grilled shrimp is awesome. If you go there like for lunch, you've got to get the grilled shrimp.
SPEAKER_01Did I mention the water nachos?
SPEAKER_00The water nachos. Don't get those. Um, yeah, so something we'd skip next time. The water nachos and the $300 bottle of wine. Remember, everything you do, divide by 20. Uh if you're not the math person in your relationship, leave it to the other person.
SPEAKER_01But also say no if the non-math person says it.
SPEAKER_00That's right. Something we'd absolutely do again. I think just go. Oh shit. You know what? What? We didn't talk about the games we participated in. I want to talk about that real quick.
SPEAKER_01Okay.
SPEAKER_00Okay, so we did a couple games. Did a couple of the yeah, the game maker games. The game maker games.
SPEAKER_01Um the booby the third or fourth day, yeah.
SPEAKER_00So we did like guess your partner. I guess your partner. And for the guys, it was you're blindfolded and you touch all the boobs of the women.
SPEAKER_01I think it was 10 contestants.
unknownYeah.
SPEAKER_01All mismatched.
SPEAKER_00Yeah, all mismatched, and you felt all the I got to feel all of the boobies. So we did that game. I guess Trinity is right, of course, because they're my favorite. For the guys, um, it were the ladies, I guess, guessing they're guys. So it was the same thing. The ladies got blindfolded, you grab the chest, and then the off the option was to grab the banana.
SPEAKER_01The game makers like, come on. Like, she didn't give me a choice. She's like, You're doing the banana. Okay.
SPEAKER_00Yep. So I did it. The banana.
SPEAKER_01I did a real estate check for everybody.
SPEAKER_00I loved that. Yeah, you did size checks.
SPEAKER_01Oh, yeah.
SPEAKER_00I'm still the same small size check.
SPEAKER_01Neo has something that's easily recognizable. And so I absolutely was banking on that. And the game maker's like, I know you cheated. I'm like, I don't think that's cheating.
SPEAKER_00It's not cheating. If I have hardware somewhere. I will just say that. I have pierced nipples. Um, and Trinity was easily able to find those. What I thought was funny was this other woman who had actually grabbed my nipples thought I was her husband, and I was the only one that had pierced nipples there.
SPEAKER_01Her husband does not have piercings. They both they both missed.
SPEAKER_00They both, did you right?
SPEAKER_01Yeah, they need to have sex with each other more.
SPEAKER_00Yeah. So but Trinity and I think one other woman of the five or six were the only ones that grabbed uh oh, and I also had extra um participants that lined up.
SPEAKER_01So I didn't just have ten. No, I had some extras.
SPEAKER_00Some people saw Trinity there and they're like, I would like her to touch my body, and yeah, the line kept going.
SPEAKER_01I didn't mind, sure. Why not?
SPEAKER_00That's right. Um, and then Trinity played one more game, which was basically get up on the paddleboard. They tried to convince her to take her bottoms off, but you can't convince Trinity to do anything.
SPEAKER_01You can't convince me of anything.
SPEAKER_00If she says no, the answer's gonna be no, and no matter what you do, she's not gonna do it. But I was proud of her. She got up there topless and tried to ride the board while they shook it and tried to knock her off. And she's an athletic person. She did great.
SPEAKER_01But I also hadn't been on a paddle board in a few years, and I realized my error of the weight.
SPEAKER_00Oh did you?
SPEAKER_01Well, you're not supposed to look down.
SPEAKER_00You need to look up uh straight ahead. Yeah, straight ahead. Yeah, all right.
SPEAKER_01Damn.
SPEAKER_00So I just wanted to get that in there. I had to sneak that and the alligator in, so that was fun. Um all right, let's
Would We Go Back And What’s Next
SPEAKER_00see. So does desire live up to the hype?
unknownYeah.
SPEAKER_00I think yes, other than the road.
SPEAKER_01I loved it.
SPEAKER_00It was like I gotta it almost makes me want to check out Desire Pearl, but I swear it's only because I only because I want to I want a balcony.
SPEAKER_01It makes me not actually.
SPEAKER_00It makes me because you're like if it's any slower than that, yeah.
SPEAKER_01If it's any more like tone, like lower, easy, quieter, no.
SPEAKER_00I think you're right. I think you know, plus for me, like I really wanted to be in the pool more, and just how hot it was, that sucked. So being at Pearl and there's no music or that maybe light music or whatever, and it's so difficult.
SPEAKER_01I gotta say, if George and Marilyn go to Pearl, you're yeah, yeah, yeah. Like we aren't going to Pearl.
SPEAKER_00All right. Would we go back? Yes.
SPEAKER_01Yeah. I gotta have a GoFundMe, but yeah.
SPEAKER_00Oh my gosh, yes. Yes, yes. But we're gonna find out because I'm also curious. Like, we've said it before, we're going to room 77.
SPEAKER_01Oh, yeah. I'm pretty sure I mentioned that every time.
SPEAKER_00That's right. So we're going there, which is in Cancun, too. It's Isla Muharis, like the island right off of there, and they're doing their hotel takeover. I am so excited about that too. And I'm like, if that one's better, then I don't I I don't know if I need to go back to Desiree.
SPEAKER_01And I can't wait. Yeah, I can't wait to see like what that looks like. And I am looking forward to meeting uh Richard and Lauren and hearing Lauren's laugh.
SPEAKER_00I will always say that. Like, yeah. So fun. So that's gonna be fun. Um, yeah, so I think that wraps up our show. We would definitely go to Desire Again. Um, it was pricey, still recommend it. If you're new and concerned, like nervous and all of that, like there's nothing to be nervous about.
SPEAKER_01That's a great starting point just to dip your toes in.
SPEAKER_00You can do as much or as little as you want there, and so that it's it's a great place to be. Um, for us, it's not too far too hard to get to, so that was good for us too.
SPEAKER_01Travel wise, yeah.
SPEAKER_00All right, I think that's it for today. Wraps things up, right?
SPEAKER_01Yeah, yeah. We've got stuff to do, people. We've got stuff to do. We've got a busy evening.
SPEAKER_00Yes, we do. Maybe a story around that.
SPEAKER_01Let's see.
SPEAKER_00Okay. Well, with that, I'm Neo.
SPEAKER_01And I'm Trinity.
SPEAKER_00Have a great day, people. Sexy people.
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